Sunday, November 18, 2012

Sick and tired of people deciding stuff about my life. My life is MINE, I AM the one who makes the choices, I AM the one who leads it. STOP FUCKIN MESSING EVERYTHING GOOD THERE IS IN IT.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

The Return

The one I love. The one I hate. The one I miss. My best friend. The one I need. The one who completes me. The one I want to punch hard in the face. The one I can't stand his pain. The one I wanna hurt so bad. The one I can't bare to hurt.

Back from Underland. Himself again. My love. My friend. My support.
Beside me. As it is supposed to be. As it was always supposed to be.
Free from her venomous tentacles.

The one I blamed for not keeping promises. The one who tried to keep the promises to a minimum, because of her. The one who was trying to keep the promise and I didn't know.

Back. Again.

Friday, August 24, 2012

. . . . . .

Who am I kidding? I miss you. I miss every inch of you.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Losing Faith

There comes a time in life when you lose your faith..in love. When you've seen so much, you start to believe that true,undying love is just a fairytale. When you've seen so much pain, so many lies, betrayal, not just about you but from people all around the world. How are you supposed to keep your faith? How are you supposed to believe in something you never witnessed, something you thought you felt but then the betrayal came just around to open your eyes?
"when you've seen,seen too much and too young, young, soulless is everywhere"
What if true love does not actually exist? Sure, we are supposed to see it in movies, read about it in books. But does that make it real? Or just another dream we hope will come true?

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Written in the stars

We used to look at all those stars and hope that we would still watch them together till forever. Then you'd open your arms and you'd pull me closer to you. Hold me tight, kiss my forehead. Whisper those sweet,sacred words. Bury your face in my hair. Then I'd take your hand and sqeeze it in mine. And then we'd stare at those bright stars, just like we always did.
Then the end came and stars stopped shining for us. Afraid, they decided to disappear till we found our way back to each other. Cause the stars shone only for us. They were ours. They light our way.
But then suddenly, a tiny little star decided to start shining again. Slowly slowly, it started making its way back to the sky. Then another star started shining, too. The stars realised maybe our way was different. Maybe they didn't have to show us one common way. They thought that maybe, if they showed two different paths, they would succeed in their puprose. And maybe, who knows, those two paths might interfere again,someday. And then maybe, the two paths would become one again.
The little star twinkled in confidence and hope.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Monster

"You were my conscious, so solid, now you're like water. Then we started drowning. Not like we'd sink any further. But I let my heart go, It's somewhere down at the bottom. But I'll get a new one and come back for the hope that you've stolen."




-Paramore

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Ανίδαιο σύστημα..


Εκ μέρους όλων των μαθητών των Μαθηματικών κατεύθυνσης της Γ Λυκείου, θα ήθελα να εκφράσω την έντονη μου αγανάκτηση και απογοήτευση για το φετινό δοκίμιο των τελικών εξετάσεων. Δε θα αναφερθώ στη δυσκολία του γραπτού. Τα κλάματα, οι φωνές και οι διαμαρτυρίες των μαθητών μόλις βγήκαν από τις αίθουσες, πιστεύω τα λένε όλα.

Αυτό που μου προκαλεί αγανάκτηση, είναι ο τρόπος διόρθωσης μιας συγκεκριμένης άσκησης, της ερώτησης 4 του Μέρους Β. Το τρίτο ερώτημα αυτής της άσκησης, λύνεται με δυο τρόπους. Ο πρώτος, είναι πολύ εύκολος, έκτασης μιας γραμμής. Ο δεύτερος, ο οποίος είναι αυτός που είχε υπόψη του ο θεματοθέτης, είναι πολύ δυσκολότερος. Το ερώτημα ζητούσε «με τη βοήθεια των πιο πάνω» (αυτών που έγιναν στα άλλα υπο-ερωτήματα), να λυθεί ένα συγκεκριμένο ολοκλήρωμα. Γράφοντας το αυτό, ο δοκιμιογράφος είχε υπόψη του την δύσκολη λύση. Ναι, δικαίωμα του. Δικαίωμα, όμως δικό μας, είναι να λύσουμε το ερώτημα με όποιο τρόπο θέλουμε, αφού τα πιο πάνω μας παρέχουν απλά «βοήθεια» και δεν υποδεικνύουν καταναγκαστική χρήση τους.

Μέχρι εδώ λογικά όλοι συμφωνούμε. Τότε γιατί δόθηκαν οδηγίες να δίνονται μόνο οι μισές μονάδες σε όσους έλυσαν το ερώτημα με τον εύκολο τρόπο, δηλαδή όχι εκείνον που είχε υπόψη του ο θεματοθέτης; 

Αν ήθελε να λύσουμε το ερώτημα με έναν συγκεκριμένο τρόπο, τότε θα έπρεπε να είναι ικανός να βάλει κάτι που να λύνεται μόνο με εκείνον τον συγκεκριμένο τρόπο. Το γεγονός ότι απέτυχε σε αυτό, οφείλεται είτε στην αδυναμία του θεματοθέτη να το καταφέρει, είτε στο γεγονός ότι απλά βρήκε την άσκηση λυμένη κάπου και δεν μπήκε καν στον κόπο να την αναλύσει. Αν πάλι τα είχε υπόψη του όλ’ αυτά και επέμεινε στο να λυθεί η άσκηση με έναν συγκεκριμένο τρόπο, τότε η εκφώνηση θα έπρεπε να λέει «χρησιμοποιώντας τα πιο πάνω» ή κάτι ανάλογο που να μην άφηνε άλλες διεξόδους. Τη «βοήθεια» που –όπως έλεγε η εκφώνηση- προσφέρεται, αν θες τη χρησιμοποιείς, αν δε θες όχι. Άρα γιατί λοιπόν να δίνονται μόνο οι μισές μονάδες;

Δε φτάνει δηλαδή ο μεγάλος βαθμός δυσκολίας του γραπτού, οι μαθητές συνεχίζουν να τιμωρούνται ακόμα και γι αυτά που απάντησαν σωστά, απλά και μόνο λόγω της «περηφάνιας» του θεματοθέτη! Παράλληλα, σ’ ένα εκπαιδευτικό σύστημα που προσπαθεί να προωθήσει τη δημιουργικότητα, την καινοτομία και την κριτική σκέψη στην εκπαίδευση, αυτό και μόνο το γεγονός προβάλλει την αντίφαση ανάμεσα στα λόγια και στα έργα! Με ποιο δικαίωμα, δηλαδή, να περιορίσουν τη δημιουργικότητα του μαθητή από το να λύσει μια άσκηση με τρόπο –πολύ πιο εύκολο- από αυτόν του θεματοθέτη;  

Η πλειοψηφία των καθηγητών των Μαθηματικών συμφώνησε και υποστήριξε πως έπρεπε να δοθούν όλες οι μονάδες, χωρίς όμως αποτέλεσμα. Δηλαδή τι παράδειγμα δίνουμε στους αυριανούς νέους; Ένα σύστημα άδικο; Ένα σύστημα όπου η καινοτομία τιμωρείται λόγω ανεπάρκειας άλλων; Μια κοινωνία στην οποία πρέπει να σκύβουμε το κεφάλι στους πιο ισχυρούς;

Μετά αναρωτιόμαστε γιατί όλο και περισσότεροι μαθητές προτιμούν τα μαθηματικά κοινού κορμού και γενικά γιατί υπάρχει μείωση σε αυτούς που διαλέγουν τις θετικές επιστήμες.

Και πιο μετά αναρωτιόμαστε πού οφείλεται η αναρχία και η ασέβεια των μαθητών προς τους καθηγητές  και προς το σύστημα. Ίσως «κάποιος» να φταίει γι αυτό.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Heart Uprising

Άμαν εν μπορείς να βάλεις τζίνα που νιώθεις πάνω που τον εγωισμό σου, τότε εν εσχει τίποτε άλλο να πούμε.. Κανεί. Φαίνεται πόσο σημαντικό εν για σένα. Ευχαριστώ.




Another promise, another seed. Another, packaged lie to keep us trapped in greed. And all the, green belts wrapped around our minds and endless, red tape to keep the truth confined.
They will not control us,we will be victorius.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Υποσχέσεις

..στο Κοιλάνι

Κι αν ποτέ νιώσεις μόνος, να ξέρεις πως κάποιος, κάπου, σ' αγαπάει. Ίσως ακόμη κι αν δε σε ξέρει. Και μπορεί να σε καταλάβει.

Κι αν νιώσεις να χάνεσαι, θυμήσου πως υπάρχει ακόμη ελπίδα. Ψάξε την. Στα βάθη της ψυχής σου θα τη βρεις, στον πυρήνα της ίδιας σου της ύπαρξης. Μια μισοσβησμένη φλόγα. Τρεμοπαίζει. Μην την αφήσεις να σβήσει.
Κι αν ακόμη ο κόσμος, σου φαίνεται σκληρός, αν "καθένας χωριστά ονειρεύεται" και "δεν ακούει το βραχνά" το δικό σου, μη φοβάσαι. Γιατί ξέρεις πως δεν είσαι μόνος. Ξέρεις πού θα με βρεις...
Γιατί ξέρεις πως θα είμαι πάντα εκεί. Όπως υποσχέθηκα. Όπως πρέπει να είμαι. Όπως θέλω να είμαι.
Και δε θα χαθείς. Όχι.
Γιατί θα είμαι πάντα πλάι σου.

Monday, April 30, 2012

The Finality.

That's what's makes it the most difficult of all. The most painful. That realisation is enough to set the tears rolling,enough to make those submerged feelings in the ashes of the Dark Days, see the light of day again.
Enough to tear someone apart. Maybe not just one person this time.
The Finality. The end of an era of life. The end of a cycle.
Yes. Just as expected.
The time to finally grow up and get on with life.
The Finality. The end.
But also, the start of something new. A new life. A new bond. A new friendship(?) 
 ...............................
I just want to you to know that when everyone else had lost faith in you, I was still there. When everyone wouldn't bother to hear you, I was still there.
And I want you to know that when everyone else said I should give up on you, I didn't. When they said I deserve better, I didn't listen to them. I always didn't.

All because I love you.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Entangled.


And just when things couldn’t get any more complicated.. we made them worse. Tangled. Tangled. Tangled.
Hooray for me for having the idea.
Hope for no regrets. 
Embrace the results of your choices. 
Good luck to us to figuring things out.
Fingers crossed.


"Kisses sweet, but complicated, burning bright, but sadly faded."


Friday, April 13, 2012

Redemption.

Being right all along. So what? Same shit.
Και καταραμένο τέλος it is, indeed.
Rewrite over the tape? Nah. Not even a glimpse of hope.
And I'm angry. Angry at you, angry at those fools, angry at myself. Because If you really cared, you wouldn't believe them. If you really cared, you wouldn't mind. If you really cared, you would have tried. You would have faught for it. Seems like you don't. And I've been again the fool. I've fallen into that dark pit again, only to find myself trying to get out again, not sure of the way to do it.
It's like the tears are not enough anymore, they can't bring redemption to the soul. That's why they don't make their appearance. Sometimes it feels like everything can go back to normal. But what is, normal? Pretending each other does not exist? Or being "friends" which didn't actually turn out to be true. Cause we suck at frienship. And maybe that's the problem.
Do you still care? Do you still remember? Do you still feel the way you did? If you do,then why the hell are we doing this?! Why?
And I can't imagine anyone's lips touching mine,than yours. Or anyone's touch. It's like we were manufactured to fit together as puzzles, only now some of the pieces are missing and we suddenly can't be together again.

Words are not enough and they can never be. And I know, oh I know that when I find out those little spies..they'll wish they had never even made a thought about me. I don't know how or when. I just know someday, they'll regret the time they spilled out those poisonous words. Those words that weren't supposed to  affect you in any way, if you were smart enough to see beyond them, smart enough to trust only your heart.

Unless your heart has been poisoned,too.
"They taped over your mouth, scribbled out the truth with their lies, your little spies."
I know I'm focusing on this one little reason. But is the one that makes me the angriest of all. Cause they had no right. NO F**KING RIGHT. Cause they are all hypocrites. This is why. And because you always have a trend to believe whatever their big mouth says,without even telling me. Because even if you say you don't want anyone involved in this, you let them get involved yourself by just taking them into account!

Really, shame on you.

And I can't wait of the time that I'll finally be outta here. Oh yes, just 5 months from now. And you'll be sorry again, just like you were before. But this time there will be no other chances. Oh how I long for a different life, different people. Who don't go mess up around with your life, keep their gossips to themselves and MIND THEIR OWN BUSYNESS. If such people exist.

So this is goodbye then. Farewell. I hope you know what you meant to me...

"Now that I've tried everything,I'll numb the pain till I am made of stone."


Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Σημάδια

The secret is to not get too attached. It always fails,though.

Ήταν σα να έβλεπε την ίδια κασέτα ξανά.. Μπορούσε να αναγνωρίσει το τέλος από την εμφάνιση των σημαδιών: αργά, δειλά, με αυξανόμενη συχνότητα, ίσα ίσα ώστε να μπορέσει να τα χωνέψει και να αντιληφθεί το νόημά τους. Αδιαφορία, βαρεμάρα, δικαιολογίες.. Ναι, το είχε ξαναδεί αυτό το σενάριο. Ήξερε πού θα κατέληγε. Ίσως όχι τώρα, ίσως όχι πολύ σύντομα, όμως σίγουρα τα σημάδια δε θα παρέκκλιναν από τον τελικό τους προορισμό. Απλά.. ίσως τελικά να μην ήταν γραφτό. Μπορούσε να το νιώσει. Δεν ήταν αυτό που ονειρευόταν, το ιδανικό γι αυτήν ήταν κάτι το διαφορετικό, κάτι το παραμυθένιο που δε χρειαζόταν να ποτίζεται κάθε τόσο με δάκρυα πόνου.. Το φανταζόταν πως μεγάλωνε με κάθε βλέμμα, κάθε γέλιο, κάθε ζεστή αγκαλιά, κάθε παθιασμένο φιλί..

Μερικές φορές φάνταζε αληθινό. Τότε ένιωθε πως είχε κάνει τη σωστή επιλογή. Τελευταία, όμως, τα σημάδια την έκαναν να φοβάται, πιο πολύ από κάθε άλλη φορά. Αυτή τη φορά είχε δώσει τη ψυχή της, όλο της το είναι. Τους φόβους της, τους πόθους της, τις πιο απόκρυφες γωνιές της ύπαρξής της.. Τώρα ένιωθε την καρδιά της στα χέρια του ίδιου δολοφόνου, έτοιμη να κατακρεουργηθεί ξανά, και πάλι απ' την αρχή. Η κασέτα κόντευε πια στο τέλος της. Αργό, βασανιστικό.. Ζήλια, φθόνος, αγάπη, μίσος, καχυποψία, πόνος.

Ίσως κατάφερνε να γυρίσει την κασέτα πίσω. Αλλά αυτό θα έφερνε πάλι το ίδιο αποτέλεσμα. Ίσως πάλι να κατάφερνε να φτάσει στο τέλος και να το γράψει ξανά από την αρχή. Διαφορετικό πλέον. Χαρούμενο. Όπως αυτή θα το ήθελε. Ιδανικό, όπως επιζητούσε η καρδιά της.

Ίσως πάλι να παρέμενε στο ίδιο καταραμένο τέλος.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Can Love Worn out?

"..Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or Bends with the remover to remove.
O, no! It is an ever-fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken.
It is the star to every wandering bark,
whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken."

- Shakespeare Sonnet 116

 

This is how you know IT'S NOT true love.

 

Thursday, March 8, 2012

True Love

How can True Love exist, when people have stopped believing in its magic?

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Predictions

That weird feeling was in the air; she could feel it. She knew something was off. Something wasn't right. Something bad was going to happen, but she couldn't put her finger on it. Or maybe she could, but didn't want to. It was one of those times when she felt what was going to happen, but tried to deny it. She preferred to pretend she was ignorant, because what was about to happen, was her worst nightmare. Maybe she was wrong all along; nothing would actually happen. But she had to face the truth, she was rarely wrong. She didn’t want to be pessimistic, but one way or another, no matter how distant in the future, it would eventually happen. However, she felt that the bad news were close; so close, she could reach beyond the veil of the future, and feel the monstrous reality on her fingertips.

She knew. It would happen again.

History would repeat itself. The nightmare would come to life again. She was afraid. She didn't know if she could handle it again. It was true, the last time, she managed to come out of her living hell, alive. Deeply wounded, but still alive. Those wounds were still visible. Over the time they faded, but the scars remained. Those scars would always remind her of the time she lost. The time she lost the most valuable thing she had.
The wounds would open again. She remembered the feeling of being stubbed right through the heart, the overwhelming pain of her heart being ripped open. She shuddered at the thought of how it felt to regret offering her soul to someone. She thought back at the time it took to build all these walls around her. Now the time had come again, they would be destroyed.

Yes, it was close. She wasn't ready to face it. She would never be. But when the time would come, she would stare into the horrific eyes of the Disaster and punch it right in the face. She would come out again alive, stronger.

She would be burned, just to be reborn from the ashes.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Missing.

It's one of those times when I wonder If I am actually trying enough. I do try. Though do I do my best? I don't think so. And that just sucks. Cause it's not about me. Well,it actually is partly; though at some point you stop thinking about yourself anymore. Results? Pain. Jealousy. Why? Cause it hurts to know there are other people there who already fill up your absent place. And it sucks knowing how many wonderful moments you are missing, when in fact those others live them, with the person you love most. Those moments which are yours to live, yours to cherish. You may say, true, but you didn't grab the chance when you could. But that doesn't depend entirely on you. In fact, If I could, I definitetly would have changed the whole story.
I just hate knowing what I am missing. I also hate NOT knowing what I am missing. I guess I actually hate MISSING things. Chances. People. Moments. People. People. People..
........
She sighed under her blue umbrella and continued walking under the pouring rain, knowing she missed another chance to see him. Maybe one day,she would make up to him.